John Michael Hayes's The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956)

One of my favorite sets of characters from a Hitchcock film are Jo McKenna’s theatrical friends from the remake of The Man Who Knew Too Much. Hitchcock had initially intended to have character named Doctor Craig, a former instructor of Ben’s, to aid the McKenna’s in their search for their kidnapped son. Instead, John Michael Hayes came up with a colorful group of characters — two of which were based on real people from the London theater world, Val and Helen Parnell. Unfortunately some of cleverest lines never made it into the film. The excerpt which follows would have come after Jo realizes that Ben has gone off to find the wrong Ambrose Chappell. She learns that Ambrose Chapel is not a man, but a place.

JO

I’m very sorry. But have another drink – and please explain to Ben when he comes in.

She hurries out the door. The others are left standing, looking at each other. Val and Helen speak almost at the same time, asking each other the same question.

HELEN AND VAL

Explain what?

CINDY

There's something strange going on around here that I can't fathom. (dig.)

JAN

It's very simple.

They all look at her, as she pours herself another drink.

JAN

When they were in Africa both of them were bitten by the tsetse fly.

(holds up drink)

Now if they'd drunk more Scotch they'd have been immune.

Cindy gives Jan a look of disgust.

CINDY

It's a good thing someone invented the farce - or you'd have no place in our society.

VAL

Let's see if we can figure this out. First of all there was a man named...uh...

HELEN

Ambrose Chapel.

CINDY

And Ben rushed off to see him.

HELEN

Then Jo said it wasn't a man, but a place....and she dashed off.

JAN

Don't mention it again, or I might dash off.

CINDY

What a temptation.

HELEN

Can you fathom it, Val?

Val paces thoughtfully, and they watch him.

VAL

I have the feeling it's a sort of a....sort of a... scavenger hunt. An international scavenger hunt!

He looks to them for approval.

JAN

But in a scavenger hunt, you're supposed to bring home what you find. How could they bring home a chapel?

CINDY

Ever hear of William Randolph Hearst?

HELEN

No, Val...be serious. It isn't anything like that.

VAL

How can I be serious about something that's so ridiculous?

He goes to drinks.

VAL

Let's have another drink - then we can really dream up an explanation. If it's good enough maybe Graham Greene'll buy the plot.

At that moment, the door suddenly opens. Everyone turns in surprise. Ben is standing in the doorway. He comes slowly into the room, closing the door. He is very tired looking, and disheveled. They watch him enter, silently.

In the final draft script, much of the above dialogue is lost, and ends with Val saying, “It must be a new American gag, I’ll ask Danny about it.” The “Danny” Val is speaking of is Danny Kaye, who was a smash when he appeared at Val Parnell’s London Palladium a few years earlier. In their treatment for The Man Who Knew Too Much, Hitchcock and Hayes even included a note to have one of the bouquets in the McKenna’s suite from Danny Kaye in case he was playing the Palladium at the time.

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